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the definite and indefinite​.​.​. integrals of logarithmic and exponential functions

by paco estrada

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1.
i've been living my life like a ghost in the rain, slowly losing my mind, slowly going insane. wandering around in the middle of the road, just another lost soul in another fish bowl. i played your game and i played my hand. got nothing to show for but a broken man. i got nothing left to win or lose just another shade of blue in the ruise of the bruise. the only way they tell me i'll survive is leaving every ounce of hope behind. and this is the damage thats done, when one of us cannot move on. if push never comes to the shove then never again will i love. so shut me out and close your eyes. if i'm out of sight then i'm out of mind. do you think that letting time pass by will clean this mess you left behind? the only way they tell me i'll survive... this is the damage thats done... you're gonna see me: broken down, beaten up, drinking wine from an empty cup. stumbling round in my father's shoes and i'm always trying to shake these blues. i built these walls and i cut these chains cause i never want to love again. if not for me than atleast for you, for something great... for something new. this is the damage thats done... why can't i?
2.
what if i told you that? all you have to do is kiss me. it takes it all away, it takes it all the way, every song i never sang, every gift you never gave. we let the masks keep us enslaved to keep the flood of love at bay, to find that all the while that you and i were just the same, we're just the same. suppose i told you that i'm still in love and it won't go away. the hardest part of letting go is knowing when to walk away. i try so hard at loving me but loving you comes so naturally. its all that i am and all i'll ever be. what if i told you that? just like the moon pulls on the tide, you and i have a history. its a memory of photograph where you and i were holding hands in a book you'll see the movie of atleast twelve times before the summer ends. but you'll go back to school again, and i'll just keep on traveling, our separate lives unraveling and i don't know how to handle it cause i don't know how to be your suppose i told you that...
3.
i kept a photograph of you and me together. kept it under my bed in a box of old love letters. i take it out sometime cause it helps me remember how simple life can be. it feels like everyday is exactly the same. too many faults and too many blames. too many candles and not enough flames and too many nights without you in the rain. your sweet whiskey kisses. thats what i've been missing. when you lose your inhibitions. your sweet whiskey kisses. she left me yesterday. saw her note upon the table, says she doesn't think i'm able to face my fear of labels. i'm gonna be just fine cause shes the one who bides my time but you're the one who's always on my mind. i need forgiveness. i need a hand. i need a phone call. i need a friend. i need someone who can give me tonight and doesn't need to see me in the morning light. your sweet whiskey kisses...
4.
bicycle wine 05:11
bicycle wine. sweet autumn time. another texas night of the east texas kind. soft candy lips. one more drag and more sip before she breaks away to dance alone. was it the whiskey and wine? were the lights lit just right? our kiss made sparks in the dark brighter than the moonlight. bicycle, bicycle wine. your eyes can be the death of me. your soul it can set me free. so much responsibility for anyone so young. whiskey myers on the radio. for one more moment i will hold you close. cause when tomorrow comes you might push me away. was it the whiskey and wine?...
5.
i play ryan's records all night when i cannot sleep. pretend that i'm holding you tight, closer than god is to me. i run your hair through my fingers, i run my hand through your soul. the part of me that wants you to linger is the part of me that just won't let go... to your memory. i lit a candle today and called out your name. i laid one coral rose on the side of the bed where you used to lay. and lately when i get to thinking i think of you more than most. and every time i get to drinking i raise this glass for a toast... to your memory.
6.
spark 05:08
i've been around. kept the wolf at the doorway, and it gets me thinking, how will they remember me? did i make some change? did i observe patience? did i change a life? was love my purpose? so please don't be afraid. the dawn must turn to day... it only takes one spark to set the world on fire. you're gonna find when hard times arrive, that time after time, hard times just get harder. but one day you'll see things aren't what they seem and you'll find the lesson of love and forgiveness in everything. so please don't be afraid. the dawn must turn to day. it only takes one spark to set the world on fire. que cera cera whats gonna be will be. one little spark in the dark, one little glimmer of hope, one little candle that burns, one little story that yearns cause it only takes one spark to set the world on fire. que cera cera.
7.
blind dove 01:07
blind dove. blind dove. blind dove. blind dove. blind dove. blind dove.
8.
when the night is long and storm seems to linger on. when you're broken bruised and beaten down and your inner glow is all burnt out... for always, forever and a day, right here by your side, i belong to you. with your hand in mine, i belong to you. should the blade draw near. if you've given up my dear. should the thought of letting go be easier than facing the fear. for always, forever and a day, right here by your side, i belong to you. with your hand in mine, i belong to you. can you feel it? can you feel it now? love will rise. love will rise. when the clouds have cleared. when we've learned all our lessons here. when death is a doorway and theres nothing left to fear. for always, forever and a day, right here by your side, i belong to you. with your hand in mine, i belong to you.
9.
before the first time two lovers ever danced in the rain. before true love ever knew pain. before our sun bursted into flames. before all the flowers had their names. thats when we were made...for eachother. long before the earth was round. before gravity came and held us down. before the first born cried in his mother's arms. before the first girl came and broke his heart. before the last train to clarksville. before the long and winding road. when we didn't have to use a stairway to heaven and you never had to be alone. thats when we were made...for eachother. before the man became the man. before we had to play the game. before the whole world just went mad, before we ended up insane and in love. thats when we were made.
10.
we stumbled in the dark. turned the radio up. the moonlight coming through the room it helped me get a better view of you. you know that i know that nothing here is set in stone. i know that you know every secret down in my soul. i think we both know the deepest of the wounds love can bring. but baby everybody knows, i can talk you into anything. you said lets take it slow. nobody has to know. in between these sheets our bodies speak. they talk of something colorful and free. you know that i know that nothing here is set in stone. i know that you know every secret down in my soul. i think we both know the deepest of the wounds love can bring. but baby everybody knows, i can talk you into anything. you let your guard down by throwing the towel in. but i was there to lift you up and get you back in the fight again. you know that i know...
11.
ghosts 04:30
the sun exposes way too much. so the shutters spend their days all shut. it would be easier to raise the dead than to get yourself out of that bed. there's cracks in everything you see. like a puzzle with a missing piece. the only way that stress relieves is to medicate and pray for sleep. i found you my friend at the bottom of the rope again and i won't let you hang yourself just yet til you've heard everything i i've said. you don't have to be alone. i will lie down with you in the middle of the road. i will take these arms and hold you close and we'll wait until the car crash comes to turn us into ghosts. you're in the darkest corner of the the darkest house. on the darkest block that's in this town. you're the only one that has the key so i'll keep on knocking til you hear me. i am not designed to read your mind. thats the one flaw that makes a man a man. cause if i could i'd try to fix it all and you'd end up hating me istead. i found you my friend at the bottom of the rope again and i won't let you hang yourself just yet til you've heard everything i i've said. you don't have to be alone. i will lie down with you in the middle of the road. i will take these arms and hold you close and we'll wait until the car crash comes to turn us into ghosts. into ghosts.
12.
leave 04:09
written by johnny goudie set me on fire, burn the original. i know that you were the one who arrested the truth at the door. don't let it go on, don't let it go anywhere... just leave. so what made you think that you were invisable? i know, and its just in the way that you smile when you laugh that i know. don't let it go on, don't let it go anywhere... just leave. just leave. just leave. just leave.

about

this is a collection of simplicity. showcasing the effectiveness of simple melodies. the only fancy thing about this album is its ability to make you sing along as you listen.

credits

released April 1, 2011

paco estrada vocals, guitars, pianos, synth cello, synth upright bass, and harmonica
guest vocals by tessa gaston, ashley falgout, and layla angeline
emsy robinson bass guitar
jay t the magician drums, editing, engineering, mixing, and mastering
jeremy rodriguez aka tomahawk jones all programming on "i belong to you"

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about

paco estrada Dallas, Texas

after nationally touring rock band southfm(mca/geffen/brando) played its final show in oct 2006, band's lead singer/songwriter continued to make music. expanding into different genres and exploring several pallets of sound, this site is the public documentation of the singer song writer's ideas and projects as he learns and grows as an artist. ... more

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